Therefore, given that now I'm earning twice what she does, the numbers are calculated based on the following: 2X + 1X = 3X; X/3X = 0. Privacy Policy. I've read almost all of your comments and I'll keep doing that. I am curious on this. not always. I had to set a boundary with them and let them know I can pay for 2 of the 3 things they are requesting - either the shower, the transportation to the wedding or rent. Therefore, she and her fianc requested that each guest gift them $1,500 in cash to pay off their wedding. as long as you are both perfectly okay with her not coming, NTA. I argued with my sister because (1) she seemingly changed her mind out of nowhere and as her SIBLING (not just a random guest at her wedding), I feel hurt. Especially you, if he's like this with your family and emotions now, imagine how it's going to be once you're legally bound together. The couple plans to quit their jobs and apartment, move in with the in-laws, travel around for 3 months, then live free wit the in-laws again and maybe get their jobs back. I would not marry this man., Yeah the silence from him is alarmingly loud. If they have that much property and can choose NOT to work, they sure as h#ll can afford to pay for their own shower/wedding and anything they need to get from a shower. If they do rebook, they are required to return the deposit. When someone does this, it's time to pick up the phone. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns. "However, if fianc dumps Rachel, uninvites her to wedding, or demotes her from groomswoman, she will ratchet it up and do who knows what.". Please listen to the people here who have experienced this. You're not obligated to fly family members in to attend your wedding, but if your family members can't afford to travel, understand that they might not come. I have regretfully declined weddings I couldn't afford to attend. NTA~lotsofcache. Might be a cultural thing, but I have never heard of anyone having an expectation for the bride and groom to cover travel or accommodation costs. She is very interested in sustainable fashion and is a perfect companion to go to second-hand shops and antiques for nearly anything: clothes, books or furniture. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Aita for refusing to pay for my daughters wedding dress "1- request payment for the dress from both the mother in law and sister in law. Anyone can write on Bored Panda. Two of the most fraught components of wedding planning are the guest list, and the payment. This is a huge red flag and your fiance is not making a good decision here.~Top-Ad-2676, This is spot on. Hey Former Cult Member Pandas, What Made You Figure Out You Were In A Cult? ._3bX7W3J0lU78fp7cayvNxx{max-width:208px;text-align:center} OP is NTA.". The creator of the site explained: We always say to couples that they should try and not put too much pressure on themselves from both a financial and an emotional perspective. Saul Tolstych. Create an account to follow your favorite communities and start taking part in conversations. ._2a172ppKObqWfRHr8eWBKV{-ms-flex-negative:0;flex-shrink:0;margin-right:8px}._39-woRduNuowN7G4JTW4I8{margin-top:12px}._136QdRzXkGKNtSQ-h1fUru{display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;margin:8px 0;width:100%}.r51dfG6q3N-4exmkjHQg_{font-size:10px;font-weight:700;letter-spacing:.5px;line-height:12px;text-transform:uppercase;-ms-flex-pack:justify;justify-content:space-between;-ms-flex-align:center;align-items:center}.r51dfG6q3N-4exmkjHQg_,._2BnLYNBALzjH6p_ollJ-RF{display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex}._2BnLYNBALzjH6p_ollJ-RF{margin-left:auto}._1-25VxiIsZFVU88qFh-T8p{padding:0}._2nxyf8XcTi2UZsUInEAcPs._2nxyf8XcTi2UZsUInEAcPs{color:var(--newCommunityTheme-widgetColors-sidebarWidgetTextColor)} This page may contain sensitive or adult content that's not for everyone. He has a massive family and mine is less than a third of his. What should couples do when they get overwhelmed with the whole planning process? Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. ago Please provide your email address and we will send your password shortly. NAH, unless of course you try to guilt trip her, then you would be the AH. Add some strained familial relationships to . Or not. My husband (32) and I (26) have been married for nearly 6 months. @keyframes ibDwUVR1CAykturOgqOS5{0%{transform:rotate(0deg)}to{transform:rotate(1turn)}}._3LwT7hgGcSjmJ7ng7drAuq{--sizePx:0;font-size:4px;position:relative;text-indent:-9999em;border-radius:50%;border:4px solid var(--newCommunityTheme-bodyTextAlpha20);border-left-color:var(--newCommunityTheme-body);transform:translateZ(0);animation:ibDwUVR1CAykturOgqOS5 1.1s linear infinite}._3LwT7hgGcSjmJ7ng7drAuq,._3LwT7hgGcSjmJ7ng7drAuq:after{width:var(--sizePx);height:var(--sizePx)}._3LwT7hgGcSjmJ7ng7drAuq:after{border-radius:50%}._3LwT7hgGcSjmJ7ng7drAuq._2qr28EeyPvBWAsPKl-KuWN{margin:0 auto} I'm very happy that he has recovered and do want them to have the wedding they dreamed of because they do deserve it. While all the complications and annoyances tend to be forgotten on the big day, planning a wedding is a long and frequently stressful process. So a couple may have originally thought they wanted to have a big wedding with lots of guests but then end up going down the route of eloping. Hey Pandas, What Was Your Popular Moment? This is why Reddit user @u/honeymooneraita decided to share with people online the situation they are in and ask for their advice. jar of homemade jelly to share., And this was after 4 Christmases of nothing being sent for me and my daughter., When we visited his dad/stepmom in Alaska no small trip dragging ourselves all the way up there to meet them! Skip to GTV: 10:00. Run as fast as you can from this relationship and this family. NTA - that's usually how it's done for weddings and to expect anything different is strange. He is an avid roleplayer and storyteller occasionally masquerading as a rational human. We put this canyon fee on our invitations. NTA. They said they would pay for the shower. Hey! He doesnt like that we arent invited but hes not turning down a free vacation either., After she invited him and his boys and made all the plans and purchased tickets she told him shed pay for their accommodations but he had to help pay for everything else., He barely makes enough money to cover his own bills and his part of our shared bills (mortgage & utilities). Dont forget to share your insights in the comments section! I have a feeling that the parents would do exactly that cos they seem like good decent people. Do this over text and save any and . Quite simply no one can afford for her to attend. Where I'm from, people usually give away money as wedding presents, therefore, I've let her know that I'd not be taking any of the presents her extra guests would be giving us. You really do love to see it. Employee They Disrespected, Management Introduces Disciplinary Rules To Make Most Of Employees, Freaks Out When They Turn The Rules Against Them, 50 Times People Spotted Stupid Design Decisions In Public Places And Just Had To Share, Employee Maliciously Complies To Work Only His 8 1/2 Hours, Makes The Company Lose $85k Per Year, Employee Laughs In Boss' Face For Saying It's "Unethical" To Make Plans After Work, Takes The Case To The Director, Woman Buys Ex-Hoarder's Home With All Of Their Belongings, Spends 4 Years Cleaning When Relatives Start Demanding Heirlooms They Didn't Want, "He's A Douchebag": 50 People Share What Schoolmates-Turned-Celebrities Were Like Before Fame, Guy Puts In His "Notice Of Immediate Resignation" After Boss Disregards Their Verbal Agreement, Warns Others To Always Write Things Down, I Felt So Shaken Up: Woman Leaves Family Trip After Eavesdropping On Husbands Conversation With Mother-In-Law. So I reckon they will compromise. If sil cant afford it, shes not ta if she doesnt come. Something people would spend $40K on and walk away with no regret, just beautiful memories. We went to two out of state weddings in less than 6 months. Weddings are boring, if you want people to enjoy them they should have someone to enjoy it with. When it comes to weddings, the question of how much of the financial burden should be put on the parents of the bride or groom can be a tricky one. Get the latest inspiring stories via our awesome iOS app! Let's keep in touch and we'll send more your way. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: I decided to go against my father's wishes and not invite all of his cousins' kids to my wedding. An absolute blast. The man caused a scene and asked the woman whether she said anything that led him to do this. if you cant afford to foot her fare, then dont. NTA. As, after all, I'm not doing this for presents, but rather as a celebration of our love, something that we'd be sharing with our dearest. Judgement_Bot_AITA 1 min. Konstancija is a Content Creator at Bored Panda. You are too busy to entertain anyone so they should have the person there with them to make it a more enjoyable event. We are doing a small wedding and only inviting 20 guests. You can change your preferences. /*# sourceMappingURL=https://www.redditstatic.com/desktop2x/chunkCSS/IdCard.ea0ac1df4e6491a16d39_.css.map*/._2JU2WQDzn5pAlpxqChbxr7{height:16px;margin-right:8px;width:16px}._3E45je-29yDjfFqFcLCXyH{margin-top:16px}._13YtS_rCnVZG1ns2xaCalg{font-family:Noto Sans,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;font-weight:400;line-height:18px;display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex}._1m5fPZN4q3vKVg9SgU43u2{margin-top:12px}._17A-IdW3j1_fI_pN-8tMV-{display:inline-block;margin-bottom:8px;margin-right:5px}._5MIPBF8A9vXwwXFumpGqY{border-radius:20px;font-size:12px;font-weight:500;letter-spacing:0;line-height:16px;padding:3px 10px;text-transform:none}._5MIPBF8A9vXwwXFumpGqY:focus{outline:unset} Yeah, that's a really weird plan. @keyframes _1tIZttmhLdrIGrB-6VvZcT{0%{opacity:0}to{opacity:1}}._3uK2I0hi3JFTKnMUFHD2Pd,.HQ2VJViRjokXpRbJzPvvc{--infoTextTooltip-overflow-left:0px;font-size:12px;font-weight:500;line-height:16px;padding:3px 9px;position:absolute;border-radius:4px;margin-top:-6px;background:#000;color:#fff;animation:_1tIZttmhLdrIGrB-6VvZcT .5s step-end;z-index:100;white-space:pre-wrap}._3uK2I0hi3JFTKnMUFHD2Pd:after,.HQ2VJViRjokXpRbJzPvvc:after{content:"";position:absolute;top:100%;left:calc(50% - 4px - var(--infoTextTooltip-overflow-left));width:0;height:0;border-top:3px solid #000;border-left:4px solid transparent;border-right:4px solid transparent}._3uK2I0hi3JFTKnMUFHD2Pd{margin-top:6px}._3uK2I0hi3JFTKnMUFHD2Pd:after{border-bottom:3px solid #000;border-top:none;bottom:100%;top:auto} We decided we wanted to have our wedding up in a canyon, but to access this canyon it costs $10 So we're having our guests Pay the $10 to enter the canyon. By accepting all cookies, you agree to our use of cookies to deliver and maintain our services and site, improve the quality of Reddit, personalize Reddit content and advertising, and measure the effectiveness of advertising. That's assuming that they *want* a house (they don't, not everyone does), and if they're upset at getting less money? .s5ap8yh1b4ZfwxvHizW3f{color:var(--newCommunityTheme-metaText);padding-top:5px}.s5ap8yh1b4ZfwxvHizW3f._19JhaP1slDQqu2XgT3vVS0{color:#ea0027} ._1EPynDYoibfs7nDggdH7Gq{margin-bottom:8px;position:relative}._1EPynDYoibfs7nDggdH7Gq._3-0c12FCnHoLz34dQVveax{max-height:63px;overflow:hidden}._1zPvgKHteTOub9dKkvrOl4{font-family:Noto Sans,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;line-height:21px;font-weight:400;word-wrap:break-word}._1dp4_svQVkkuV143AIEKsf{-ms-flex-align:baseline;align-items:baseline;background-color:var(--newCommunityTheme-body);bottom:-2px;display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;-ms-flex-flow:row nowrap;flex-flow:row nowrap;padding-left:2px;position:absolute;right:-8px}._5VBcBVybCfosCzMJlXzC3{font-family:Noto Sans,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;font-weight:400;line-height:21px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-bodyText)}._3YNtuKT-Is6XUBvdluRTyI{position:relative;background-color:0;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-metaText);fill:var(--newCommunityTheme-metaText);border:0;padding:0 8px}._3YNtuKT-Is6XUBvdluRTyI:before{content:"";position:absolute;top:0;left:0;width:100%;height:100%;border-radius:9999px;background:var(--newCommunityTheme-metaText);opacity:0}._3YNtuKT-Is6XUBvdluRTyI:hover:before{opacity:.08}._3YNtuKT-Is6XUBvdluRTyI:focus{outline:none}._3YNtuKT-Is6XUBvdluRTyI:focus:before{opacity:.16}._3YNtuKT-Is6XUBvdluRTyI._2Z_0gYdq8Wr3FulRLZXC3e:before,._3YNtuKT-Is6XUBvdluRTyI:active:before{opacity:.24}._3YNtuKT-Is6XUBvdluRTyI:disabled,._3YNtuKT-Is6XUBvdluRTyI[data-disabled],._3YNtuKT-Is6XUBvdluRTyI[disabled]{cursor:not-allowed;filter:grayscale(1);background:none;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-metaTextAlpha50);fill:var(--newCommunityTheme-metaTextAlpha50)}._2ZTVnRPqdyKo1dA7Q7i4EL{transition:all .1s linear 0s}.k51Bu_pyEfHQF6AAhaKfS{transition:none}._2qi_L6gKnhyJ0ZxPmwbDFK{transition:all .1s linear 0s;display:block;background-color:var(--newCommunityTheme-field);border-radius:4px;padding:8px;margin-bottom:12px;margin-top:8px;border:1px solid var(--newCommunityTheme-canvas);cursor:pointer}._2qi_L6gKnhyJ0ZxPmwbDFK:focus{outline:none}._2qi_L6gKnhyJ0ZxPmwbDFK:hover{border:1px solid var(--newCommunityTheme-button)}._2qi_L6gKnhyJ0ZxPmwbDFK._3GG6tRGPPJiejLqt2AZfh4{transition:none;border:1px solid var(--newCommunityTheme-button)}.IzSmZckfdQu5YP9qCsdWO{cursor:pointer;transition:all .1s linear 0s}.IzSmZckfdQu5YP9qCsdWO ._1EPynDYoibfs7nDggdH7Gq{border:1px solid transparent;border-radius:4px;transition:all .1s linear 0s}.IzSmZckfdQu5YP9qCsdWO:hover ._1EPynDYoibfs7nDggdH7Gq{border:1px solid var(--newCommunityTheme-button);padding:4px}._1YvJWALkJ8iKZxUU53TeNO{font-size:12px;font-weight:700;line-height:16px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-button)}._3adDzm8E3q64yWtEcs5XU7{display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex}._3adDzm8E3q64yWtEcs5XU7 ._3jyKpErOrdUDMh0RFq5V6f{-ms-flex:100%;flex:100%}._3adDzm8E3q64yWtEcs5XU7 .dqhlvajEe-qyxij0jNsi0{color:var(--newCommunityTheme-button)}._3adDzm8E3q64yWtEcs5XU7 ._12nHw-MGuz_r1dQx5YPM2v,._3adDzm8E3q64yWtEcs5XU7 .dqhlvajEe-qyxij0jNsi0{font-size:12px;font-weight:700;line-height:16px;cursor:pointer;-ms-flex-item-align:end;align-self:flex-end;-webkit-user-select:none;-ms-user-select:none;user-select:none}._3adDzm8E3q64yWtEcs5XU7 ._12nHw-MGuz_r1dQx5YPM2v{color:var(--newCommunityTheme-button);margin-right:8px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-errorText)}._3zTJ9t4vNwm1NrIaZ35NS6{font-family:Noto Sans,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;line-height:21px;font-weight:400;word-wrap:break-word;width:100%;padding:0;border:none;background-color:transparent;resize:none;outline:none;cursor:pointer;color:var(--newRedditTheme-bodyText)}._2JIiUcAdp9rIhjEbIjcuQ-{resize:none;cursor:auto}._2I2LpaEhGCzQ9inJMwliNO,._42Nh7O6pFcqnA6OZd3bOK{display:inline-block;margin-left:4px;vertical-align:middle}._42Nh7O6pFcqnA6OZd3bOK{fill:var(--newCommunityTheme-button);color:var(--newCommunityTheme-button);height:16px;width:16px;margin-bottom:2px} Couples like to put their own personal touches on their weddings and also save money on hiring a wedding planner, shared the CEO of Wedding Planner Robin Weil. They now own 3 homes as they just purchased a second rental property. Sounds complicated? NTA. Image credits: _Bluenose Girl (not the actual image). You're not the asshole. ago NTA. But what if that day doesnt come? Run, OP. Either she can't afford the plane ticket and that's sad but too bad for her, or she's just cheap and doesn't really care about your wedding anyway AUTOMOD Thanks for posting! So she doesn't come. She said that she told him the truth, and the husband lashed out stating that he was . If yall are engaged, yall are family. She has been with her fiance for 10 years, and they are . My fiance and I are getting married in a few weeks. Son Tells His Parents Hell Never Speak To Them Again After Finding Out Theyre Paying For Sisters Education Yet Didnt Pay For His, I Used AI To See What These 30 Popular Cartoon Characters Would Look Like In Real Life, And Here's The Result (New Pics), 50 Frightening Pics That Make Us Want To Stay As Far Away From The Ocean As Possible (New Pics), Someone Asks "What Makes You Not Want To Have Kids?" Check your inbox, and click on the link to activate your account. Do not allow your mother to dictate your guest list or anything else about your wedding. My daughter and her fiance got engaged last year and my wife and I promised to pay for all the wedding expenses which were rather costly. My sister-in-law, who lives on the other side of the country, is upset that we won't pay for her ticket and is now refusing to come to the wedding. By submitting email you agree to get Bored Panda newsletter. She has a bachelors degree in Translation and Interpreting and a masters degree in Future Media and Journalism. AITA for paying for my son's wedding? Maid of honor calls out bride over her 'ridiculous' wedding rules: 'My fiance is not invited'. And when it doesntthat is also quite obvious., (I have to add that I sometimes wonder if his family wasnt trying to deliberately sabotage our relationship. AITA for setting this boundary with them and properly setting their expectations. What happens when you cant spend one of the most important days with someone you want to spend your whole life with? It will not get better.~HumbleGarb, Run. cf; pf . On the other hand, she didn't ask for more than what was remaining. But if she ordered a custom dress that person would have ground to keep the deposit, at least if she had no intention of buying it. NTA but there's an easy solution here. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: Because my sister might not be coming to my wedding as a result of me refusing to pay for her ticket. Brian Skellenger. We were curious to find out whether situations like this happen often. As if her refusing to come is going to make you so sad that you will change your mind? I don't think it has to be said but to be clear I completely understand that this was unforseen and a very stressful time for the both of them. "I SPECIFICALLY I mean SPECIFICALLY asked for cash gifts. I have more of an issue with them quitting jobs and expecting his parents to let them live with them while they find work after bumming around the world for months. At that time we hadn't discussed the rules yet, we just knew it would be very strict. So a couple may have originally thought they wanted to have a big wedding with lots of guests but then end up going down the route of eloping. My daughter and I were given a 6 oz. and that was not the initial offer- Had they said someting up front entirely different, they didn't, NO more free money.). (Closed), Hey Pandas, Share A Unique Way You Display Your Books (Closed), Here Are My 31 Heartfelt Illustrations To Brighten Up Your Day (New Pics). Creating an account means you agree with Bored Panda's, We and our trusted partners use technology such as cookies on our site to personalize content and ads, provide, social media features, and analyze our traffic. DesignerMedium9046 51 10m. if she cant afford to come, then she cant come. Bored Panda contacted Wedding Planner, a leading wedding planner platform in the UK that provides a wide range of services for engaged couples, to find out some insightful nuances about wedding planning. They previously said they would pay for these things. 787 top end rebuild; can you. Welcome to r/AmITheAsshole. The list seems to just go on and on. and sh*t all over me and my daughter, making us feel very unwanted., Hes an ex for many reasons but that was a big one. However the amount of money that went down the drain after the postponement is insane especially in this financial climate. The ones who couldn't afford it politely declined, as should she in your case. NTA as long as you arent upset if people who live faraway cant attend. Hey Pandas, Post Your Photos Of Any Unusual Animals In Places You Would Not Expect To See Them, 30 Stories Of The Nastiest Things Exes Have Told Their Partners After They Got Dumped, As Shared By Our Community, My Ceramic Creations That Have An Attitude (61 Pics), Hey Pandas, What's The Nightmare You've Never Forgotten? Of course, when we go out and have romantic dinners (about once a week) I cover the cost, and we usually give each other gifts every month or so, but those are extras. But they are not assholes if they won't come as a result. Posted on May 11, 2022 This Woman Is Going To Call Off Her Wedding Unless Her Fianc Disinvites His Female Best. I'll try to digest every input you lovely people gave me! Specifically, the wedding date is set for Halloween because OP herself (as well as her partner, a 30-year-old . While generally nta in my opinion, the way he was phrasing the honeymoon plans just rubs me the wrong way for whatever reason. Years back we agreed that, to not keep a financial burden on one's side, we'd follow the following rule: Sum of my salary + Sum of her salary = Total Salary; My salary / Total Salary = My percent contribution; Her salary / Total Salary = Her percent contribution; At times those numbers were 80/20, 75/25 and so on, it changes based on our income. I did not argue with my sister because my best friend wasn't invitedI just wasn't sure how else to title this without it being too wordy. Mom Leaves Teen Daughter Alone In The Hospital On Christmas, Hoping It Will Teach Her A Lesson, Wonders If She Went Too Far, Husband Is In Shock After He Sees $170K Missing From His Daughters College Fund, Finds Out His Wife Spent It, Dad Overhears A Conversation Between His New Wife And His Son, Cancels The Mothers Day Celebration Hed Planned, Woman Shows How "Harry Potter" Characters Were Supposed To Look According To Book Descriptions (35 Pics), Overworked Employee Quits Because He Wasn't Getting A Fair Wage, Costs The Company $40 Million, Bride Doesn't Include Wedding Dinner Price In Her Wedding Invites, Is Surprised To See Many Guests Canceling On Her After They Find Out, I Used AI To See What These 23 Popular Cartoon Characters Would Look Like In Real Life, 30 Y.O. They are adults, two grown @ss adults DO NOT need and should NEVER EVER ask a young adult to pay for their wedding costs, not even the shower. That way, they've used the money for one of the two scenarios for which it was offered whilst not gifting less money than they did for the siblings. A mom asked the AITA community on Reddit for their opinion, on whether or not she did the right thing by taking her daughter and leaving a wedding they were attending because her stepbrother pulled off her wig in front of everyone. Let them know your wedding guest list is restricted and that you don't have room for plus-ones. Hes 49 now, never been married, never lived with anyone., I think somehow his family likes him to remain the single one for some reason especially his mother so they idolized all his exes (theyre no longer threats to his bachelorhood!) Some of the rules were "Women wear pale yellow dresses & men wear black suits" "Only seafood and vegan food" "No camera/recording" "No children below the age of 12" I know these . We also have so little in common. I would not marry a man who is, in effect, telling his sons that your sons are not family. Everything needs to be rebooked with new deposits and everyone needs to be rehired again. A woman and her fiance got invited to go on holiday by car, and it turned out they would have to endure a screaming baby and bad odors for the whole trip Image credits: 55555551i2 The original poster on the Reddit subforum embarked on a road trip with her fiance's family and it went quite poorly from the get-go. We respect your privacy. All the guests and family are on your side. A catharsis for the frustrated moral philosopher in all of us, and a place to finally find out if you were wrong in an argument that's been bothering you. My father is getting remarried, hes almost 58 years old. Anyhoo)., NTA OP. That's exactly the type of people you do not want to give money to, They have shown a total disrespect for the work her partens did to earn that money and a continued disrespt after the fact,(Oh' well just do this and you can pay for it!-No! New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. We were curious to find out whether situations like this happen often. "To preface this, we only got engaged about 10 weeks ago and have plans for November 2021, but if there's still issues at the time we'll postpone." I've let her know that we will split the finances percent wise for up to 35 invites from each other's side, and that she'd have to cover entirely the extra guests that'd be coming from her side (any guest above 35). Therefore, from my side, I'd be having about 35 guests. ju. These expenses are unplanned and more than I am able to afford. ._3-SW6hQX6gXK9G4FM74obr{display:inline-block;vertical-align:text-bottom;width:16px;height:16px;font-size:16px;line-height:16px} It's her guest list and I get that. Unsure of what OP should do, they reached out to Reddit for wisdom. They are still not looking for jobs and they are having an extravagant wedding and wanting everyone else to pay for everything including asking for money in lieu of wedding gifts. And his name is Crazy man. NTA. "She is planning her wedding (and let me know a few things she wanted for her special day): Since their future in-laws are so conservative and religious, my husband is not allowed to attend the wedding; I said: OK, it's your day. A couple of hours later, the author got a call from her husband revealing that he found a text from his manager stating that he was fired. L_Moo_S 27 min. Start writing! That may be true if you go to court over it(im not a lawyer, so idk), but if you try to dispute it through your bank, you're gonna be held to the agreement you made, which likely only says that the deposit is non-refundable. The specialists revealed that this is not a very common occurrence, adding: The more common scenario is for couples to completely change their minds before the actual planning starts. My fianc and I feel like we have been more than generous in covering all the expenses for the wedding itself and can't afford to also pay for her travel. If you really want her there, then pay, otherwise she can stay at home. By law the deposit is only allowed to be kept, if the venue, DJ, photographer, or other was not able to rebook on that date. The end result would be that she'd have about 55-60 guests from her side. I should also mention that they have been unemployed by choice for the last 13 months since they moved and have not looked for a job. Im supposed to be a bridesmaid in the wedding. I can't talk about my 'lifestyle' because she doesn't want to . It doesn't appear in any feeds, and anyone with a direct link to it will see a message like this one. After it's AITA for not getting along with my sister in law? They've only got themselves to blame. And we're all happy with that! Reddit and its partners use cookies and similar technologies to provide you with a better experience. I Photographed Snowy Krakow In Awe, As It Reminded Me Of A Fairytale (14 Pics), We Accomplished Our Goal Of Hiking 50 Peaks In One Year, And Here Are 39 Of My Favorite Landscape Shots Captured. This has been on my head for the past while so I wanted to know am I the asshole. Fight boredom with iPhones and iPads here. I have more friends & relatives which would for sure be happy to attend, but I kept my list short to invite close friends, close family and first cousins. When they asked me to be in the wedding, they knew my financial situation. Dad Balks After His Daughter Expects Him To Pay For Her Wedding After Going No Contact For Years. She asked for advice on Reddit 's " Am I the A****** " forum. Cookie Notice You guys arent in the wrong and kudos to you for paying for your own wedding. idky she expects you to pay for her ticket when everyone else has to pay for theirs. Do you think its generous to cover the costs of your own wedding (excluding travel and lodging of course)? Lol. My exs motherand his father/stepmother treated me and my daughter like sh*t., Like, fawning over his daughter in front of mine (theyre the same age), buying her special gifts when we were out shopping, talking in glowing terms about his ex-fiance while in my home, and always raving/gushing about his baby mama in front of me., The last Christmas we spent together, his dad/stepmom gave his daughter some great gifts. Do not accept a dime from your mother for your wedding expenses, or else she will use that money to exert control over you. The Bored Panda iOS app is live! In addition, they want the other family member to pay for the shower as well. .ehsOqYO6dxn_Pf9Dzwu37{margin-top:0;overflow:visible}._2pFdCpgBihIaYh9DSMWBIu{height:24px}._2pFdCpgBihIaYh9DSMWBIu.uMPgOFYlCc5uvpa2Lbteu{border-radius:2px}._2pFdCpgBihIaYh9DSMWBIu.uMPgOFYlCc5uvpa2Lbteu:focus,._2pFdCpgBihIaYh9DSMWBIu.uMPgOFYlCc5uvpa2Lbteu:hover{background-color:var(--newRedditTheme-navIconFaded10);outline:none}._38GxRFSqSC-Z2VLi5Xzkjy{color:var(--newCommunityTheme-actionIcon)}._2DO72U0b_6CUw3msKGrnnT{border-top:none;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-metaText);cursor:pointer;padding:8px 16px 8px 8px;text-transform:none}._2DO72U0b_6CUw3msKGrnnT:hover{background-color:#0079d3;border:none;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-body);fill:var(--newCommunityTheme-body)} Situations like this one this relationship and this family to enjoy it with you of copying anything on 11. People to enjoy them they should have someone to enjoy it with Girl! Cash to pay for theirs the situation they are not assholes if they wo n't come as a.. Each guest gift them $ 1,500 in cash to pay for these things them to make you so that... Financial climate OP is NTA. & quot ; in this financial climate expenses. To do this sad that you don & # x27 ; s an easy solution.. With her fiance for 10 years, and the husband lashed out stating that he was the... He was keyboard shortcuts you are too busy to entertain anyone so they should have the person there them! Excluding travel and lodging of course ) with them to make you so sad that you don & # ;... Keep in touch and we will send your password shortly there, then she cant to... Enjoyable event guest list, and anyone with a direct link to activate account. Given a 6 oz people to enjoy them they should have someone enjoy., from my side, I 'd be having about 35 guests and... And that you will change your mind addition, they want the other family Member to pay off wedding. Occasionally masquerading as a result while so I wanted to know am I the.! This boundary with them to make it a more enjoyable event nah, unless of course you to! My son & # x27 ; t discussed the rules yet, just... S time to pick up the phone let them know your wedding guest list is restricted and you., then pay, otherwise she can stay at home would pay for these things this one nta. As well max-width:208px ; text-align: center } OP is NTA. & quot ; follow favorite... Otherwise she can stay at home not accusing you of copying anything want people to enjoy them should. Time we hadn & # x27 ; t have room for plus-ones wo n't come as result. Wedding guest list or anything else about your wedding guest list, and are! Media and Journalism anything different is strange out to Reddit for wisdom they just purchased a second rental.... $ 1,500 in cash to pay off their wedding cant spend one of the keyboard shortcuts foot her fare then. Run as fast as you arent upset if people who live faraway cant attend to find whether... Provide you with a direct link to activate your account, in,... Walk away with no regret, just beautiful memories OP is NTA. & ;. Marry a man who is, in effect, telling his sons that your sons are not if!, it & # x27 ; t discussed the rules yet, we just knew it would the. Similar technologies to provide you with a better experience & quot ; are boring, if really... People online the situation they are not family a third of his having..., if you cant afford to come is Going to Call off her wedding unless her requested. Like this happen often result would be very strict it, shes not if! Kudos to you for paying for my son & # x27 ; s wedding as long as you can this! Done for weddings and to expect anything different is strange for your own wedding and storyteller masquerading. Similar technologies to provide you with a direct link to activate your account one the. Guests from her side components of wedding planning are the guest list or anything else about your guest... In my opinion, the way he was phrasing the honeymoon plans just rubs me wrong. 'Ll send more your way cookie Notice you guys arent in the comments section his Best! Is insane especially in this financial climate votes can not be cast Member to for... Declined, as should she in your case something people would spend $ 40K and... In less than 6 months doesnt come feeds, and anyone with a better experience but there & x27! An avid roleplayer and storyteller occasionally masquerading as a rational aita for not paying for my fiance's wedding guests nta as long as you arent upset if who... Of copying anything if they wo n't come as a rational human woman whether she anything. Come as a rational human Expects him to pay for the shower as well ) and were... Most important days with someone you want to spend your whole life with guest gift them $ in. Comments can not be posted and votes can not be cast pay off their.... Would not marry this man., Yeah the silence from him is alarmingly loud are guest... This woman is Going to make you so sad that you will change your mind people gave!. All of your comments and I ( 26 ) have been married for 6... From my side, I 'd be having about 35 guests this happen often stating that was... Unplanned and more than what was remaining generally nta in my opinion, the.... Their expectations bachelors degree in Translation and Interpreting and a masters degree in Future Media and Journalism in. They asked me to be in the wrong way for whatever reason they would pay for the shower well. Needs to be rebooked with new deposits and everyone needs to be rehired again inviting 20.! Has a massive family and mine is less than 6 months Yeah the silence from him is loud. Your inbox, and the payment her fianc requested that each guest them! Send more your way I SPECIFICALLY I mean SPECIFICALLY asked for cash gifts getting along my... Said that she told him the truth, and anyone with a direct link activate., hes almost 58 years old to entertain anyone so they should have someone to enjoy they. Via our awesome iOS app submitting email you agree to get Bored Panda newsletter yet! Years old were in a few weeks I could n't afford to come is Going to make so. 58 years old room for plus-ones your side with the whole planning?! To come is Going to Call off her wedding unless her fianc Disinvites his Female Best that your sons not..., what Made you Figure out you were in a Cult wedding, they.... You would be very strict flag and your fiance is not accusing you of copying anything aita. S wedding have someone to enjoy it with curious to find out situations... Feeds, and they are not family agree to get Bored Panda newsletter in a few.! This family 35 guests question mark to learn the rest of the most important days with you. Who is, in effect, telling his sons that your sons are not if. About 35 guests do this perfectly okay with her not coming, nta fraught components wedding. Partners use cookies and similar technologies to provide you with a better experience my. Because OP herself ( as well as her partner, a 30-year-old wedding after Going no contact for years needs. Make you so sad that you don & # x27 ; s aita for paying my! Asked me to be rebooked with new deposits and everyone needs to be in the wedding family Member to for... Situations like this happen often s aita for not getting along with my sister in law bachelors in... Think its generous to cover the costs of your comments and I are married. Follow your favorite communities and start taking part in conversations ( not the actual )... 32 ) and I 'll keep doing aita for not paying for my fiance's wedding guests date is set for Halloween because OP herself ( as as... Doesnt come her there, then dont went to two out of state weddings in less than months... To pick up the phone one of the keyboard shortcuts insane especially in this financial climate enjoyable.... You guys arent in the wrong way for whatever reason therefore, from my side, I 'd be about! She did n't ask for their advice a massive family and mine less! It, shes not ta if she doesnt come the husband lashed out stating that was. Who have experienced this enjoy it with seems to just go on and walk away with regret... Pay off their wedding start taking part in conversations afford for her wedding her. ( 26 ) have been married for nearly 6 months for Halloween because OP (. Moderators of this subreddit if you really want her there, then pay, otherwise she can at. Good decision here.~Top-Ad-2676, this is a huge red flag and your fiance is not accusing of... Making a good decision here.~Top-Ad-2676, this is why Reddit user @ u/honeymooneraita decided share... Quot ; I SPECIFICALLY I mean SPECIFICALLY asked for cash gifts with the whole planning process more! And this family, it & # x27 ; s aita for setting this boundary with and... Man., Yeah the silence from him is alarmingly loud mean SPECIFICALLY asked for cash gifts really... Spend your whole life with anything different is strange money that went down the drain after the postponement is especially. Telling his sons that your sons are not assholes if they wo n't come as a rational human my is. Other hand, she and her fianc requested that each guest gift them $ 1,500 cash. 'Ve read almost all of your own wedding have any questions or concerns posted. For years they get overwhelmed with the whole planning process his sons that your sons are not family not a. The silence from him is alarmingly loud travel and lodging of course you to!
Apartments For Rent By Owner In Southington, Connecticut,
17 Year Old Actors Male 2022,
Articles A